<白鹿原>
終於在週末折騰的地鐵上，看完《白鹿原》，還好最後朱先生死時不可抑制的眼淚是在家里流的，再也沒有這樣的人了，這一百年來，那樣凜然的尊嚴。想起上星期地鐵上，我直接拒掉傳教者曰：我信儒家。對方說了一通后說：你很自信。我回答：“哈，我知道我太不謙虛。”兩個宗教文化取向畢竟是不同的。
微博上說是很不痛快的。所以放著拖延了好幾個月的稿件，來到這裡。
百度了一下，竟然看到這本小說十月份要被拍成電影。排除掉我對視覺文化的不偏好外，光是看媒體批評論就很惱火。在我看來，陳忠實對於性的描寫可能有其充分的理由，但正如羅萌所說：這些作家對於農村的想像總流於色情（或者流於原始神秘？）。可是商業化的時候，還有什麽作為噱頭？
毋庸置疑，朱先生就是那頭白鹿，或者“白鹿精神”，進一步想，支撐著白嘉軒一路穩固興家，屹立於風雨中的風水白鹿，就是這種一脈相通的“白鹿精神”———白鹿原的“仁義之風”。我實在很感激陳忠實對儒家精神的信任。在政權更迭、相互擒殺中，他把所有的精神重任委給了關中學派。而這正是我對此小說如此喜愛的最主要原因。
可這樣說未免流於簡單。在風雨飄搖的歲月里，百無一用的書生只能做的是修縣志，而且最終因為經費不足只能勉強引發十本，給九個作者以及一個不看混亂逃跑的縣長。故事還沒完，隨著棺木入的縣志固然只能灰飛煙滅，但其他九套呢？在那群魔亂舞的年代，居在地棺都會被挖地三尺而出，更何況曝露在神州上？所以，朱先生苦心經營了一輩子的“天地之命，生民之心”，最終是否真的因“立言”而三不朽了呢？凜冽的人格，在保有自身的尊嚴上是不可侵犯讓人肅然起敬的，深知萬民為之動容，可是我們知道，生時它不能力挽狂瀾，稍微緩萬民水火之苦（賑災之後再無事矣，失去了政治權力的儒家，終究不再有任何的實際效用，余英時先生所指望的在“私”層面發揮的作用是否可行呢？）；死后的今天，陝西的民風是否淳樸如昔？在那樣流亂的日子以及可能更流亂的今天，它還淳樸嗎？
但縱然如此，我嚮往那樣的一種頂天立地。“自信平生無愧事，死後方敢對晴天”。這話真是說絕，情節的設置也煽情到極致。很多人懷疑朱先生這樣近乎完美的人是不可能。但我卻對此深信不疑。儘管被認為是關學最後一位大儒，但朱先生，白鹿書院，這導致在閱讀過程中我總是想起朱熹的面孔。我們總是用小人之心度君子之腹，用今天的種種來看平所有的存在，但漫漫歷史長河中，何嘗沒有這樣的人？說實際點，這樣的人又難道是我們做不到的？只是我們沒有原則罷了。
但縱然如此，這樣一種不愧天地的凜然良心，並非真的就能鳶飛於天，魚躍於淵地與天地合流了。余英時批評新儒家說“良心的傲慢”，確然。在朱先生尚有痕跡，更遑論白嘉軒了。小娥的悲劇是個最明顯的證據。你可以說，這是所謂的封建殘餘，或者所謂的禮教害人，但若深究，從來不往後不退後確認完全的正確，或許才是最容易鑄錯的。由頭到尾，白嘉軒從未發生任何信仰的動搖，退後。“子曰：吾日三省乎吾身”，“慎獨”與“反省”是儒家最重要的教條。任何一種以道德上的確信而進行的寬容，其實帶有太重的令人難以忍受的傲慢。
可是，我們能說什麼呢？堅定的信仰總容易走到這一步，有時這甚至只是一種英雄氣。真正讓人如沐春風，何嘗容易？是，這就是朱先生之所以為聖人，而冷、白先生只是凡夫所在。而這又是朱先生最終自己成為聖人，卻終究莫奈這個世事何。真正的儒家道德教化，是春風化雨的，而春風化雨需要實際接觸，人不找我，我不強求人。“不可與言而與之言”，夫子不為也。
罷了。閱讀時，寫到朱先生找親時，我就想，真可惜啊，這年頭沒有這樣看眼睛的男人了！
革命者的無父無母書寫（想像？）真是個可以探討的現象。（巴金三部曲）這種截斷傳統的熱血與傳統對於傳宗接代的執著，呈現了極端的兩極。看起來誰都有道理，但誰都殘酷得可以。
又，小說對於國民革命的文學想像，真是個可以追究的問題。戲劇的道德想像不也同樣嗎？
睡吧。我很高興我又回到了這個世界，而我也高興我要做這個題目。再怎麼百無一用是書生，當你想到，手中捧著的是幾千年的東西時，你才會感動人之所以人的原因。
以為半小時的成果要被電腦吞噬后，竟然保住了。想跺腳罵的同時，也想著這麼點芝麻事都忍不住，修養也真是夠到家的。
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