關於種種的情感以及由此而來的生活
肇因緣於晚上在朋友家三個女人的夜談。話題當然只有一個：愛情與婚姻。（有多久的時間，所謂的人生與夢想已經漸漸暗淡成背景，甚至消失不見了？）這是次有組織的“經驗分享會”，因為是過來人主導，所以論證詳實，數據充分，結論清晰。我承認都是一些切實可靠的建議，比如好好打扮之類的，但我不能明白的是種種挖空心思、你退我進的技巧，仿佛男女戀愛真的是一次工作面試，或者是一場帶有潛規則的遊戲。
“你這種人，要是對別人好，估計就得掏心掏肺”，朋友頗為正經地警告我。哦，我不明白，如果爲了朋友可以把生活隨時放在一邊，那爲什麽不能為我喜歡的人做事？愛情就該是一杯水，清涼解渴，自然珍貴。
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分割線以上的事與話，竟然是一個月前發生的了。當時不知為何沒有發貼，再回首一看，依然什麽也沒有。圖書館一如既往地酷冷，白熾燈的光耀眼刺目，伴著嗡嗡的冷氣聲，亙古不變的長夜。有時閃過一些念頭，想著當年要是沒有去工作，現在可能已經畢業並且可能已在某個什麽地方安定了吧。然而，畢竟任何回望都是毫無意義的，而直到此刻，我依然可以說：這每一步畢竟都是按照我的心意，它可能不是最好的，卻極可能是諸種情況中最好的一種結果。
所以，無論心情多麼沮喪或者前進缺乏動力，一切總還在那裏等著吧。望望身邊的白牆，《三體》中的面壁者形象不期然來到我腦中。回到最現實的情況，有那麼多的灰色塵埃瀰漫在那麼多人的生命中，或者如存在主義所感受到的，猛然之間一機靈，你看到的總是無窮無盡的生命的荒謬，比如你知道你現在做什麽嗎？然而，畢竟總是存在著。有這麼些時刻，也總會有些儒家所謂“生生之謂易”的天體流行不息狀態。你跟我或他，也并沒有什麽不同。
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