燈光昏黃，冷氣聲音如同所有的賓館一樣，持續不懈地陪伴著旅人。或者這是這輩子與此地的唯一交集，或者以後將不斷再來這個賓館——這個號稱台灣、甚至是漢學研究最強的學術基地，畢竟還是傳遞了短暫的熱量，讓我一度想要埋頭於研究算了。
只是，這個世界在絢爛或混亂地生長著，人們在歡樂跳躍或愁苦哭泣著，而這裡風光安寧，笑語盈耳，宛如世外桃源，美麗而不真實。靜下心來吧，他們說著，在這個聲光電影的時代，靜下心來吧。是的，可是，然後呢？
一頭深深地埋葬進了無底洞的浩瀚文獻中，再創造出更為浩瀚無底洞的的文獻。十年前，當我還沒看過甚至想過學術研究是甚麼一回事的時候，老師就說：現在文字垃圾太多。等踏足於此，才明白此中多少被無辜揮霍了的汗水。下午在研討會上，看到有與會者幾乎不知道自己在說甚麼，只能硬撐著說下去時，更深深地為此歎息，竟有些不忍起來。說到底，都是為了混口飯吃，不要太苛求於他人，但是，這個世界畢竟是真刀真槍的，沒有功夫只能是這樣。但也許，更多的時候，我埋怨這個領域過於寬容，放入太多不夠資格的人，無益於世之餘，也讓他們無辜地消耗了自己的人生——雖然大多數的工作領域也許如此。這是愛之深、責之切。
我總是太著迷於那些強者了——精神上的強者，如果有甚麼風景夠迷人、可以給人持久的力量，莫過於他們的存在。但只有那麼少的人，可以走到最巔峰。世間的生存哪有如此容易？我們這批常人，活在當下，盡其所能地伸展，本來就夠了，不是嗎？
————————————————————————————————
學術虛無主義者——這是新近得到的稱號。好笑，卻有點準確，回看這段學術研討會感想即知；但學術功利主義者或許更準確。”據說，“不為無益之事，何以遣有涯之生”，說這種話的人估計能好好地轉入某個領域一條巷子走到黑。恕我不能，人生好得很，不必如此打發。
但是呀，批評饾饤之學是很容易的，關鍵是，得有人樹立榜樣。
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